Old Poem

Ode to a Pegasus

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By: "starlet-writer"  2-5-2005

When I heard of your passing

Only the impossibility of it hit me

Months later

I can not give voice to the fact

Only the fact—not the reality

To those closest to us

It is the quiet omission of an ofte’ asked question

That acknowledges the fact

I remember

When you joined us

My sheer jubilation was clear

You were a dream in the flesh

Through repetition

I was as determined as a child can be

Not to forget your name

New friends

Unsure of each others thoughts

Yet together we triumphed

Over life’s adversities

Years passed

And with them came milestones

Events which took their place

Etched in memory

Year over year

Secrets

Unspoken comfort

Age advanced

College

Marriage

Denmark

All took me away

Even mid-city

You are never far from my thoughts

Thank you

Not ready to face the emptiness

I sit and think

Ponder

Some may think it’s foolish

We all cope

Differently

I say

“Pegasus (n) my guardian angel”

loved, missed,  never forgotten

"Walking"

The idea for today's blog entry came to me late in the game. At various stages in my life, I have been asked what it would be like if I could walk unaided. The short answer is I don't know, since I was born with Cerebral Palsy.

But, there is a longer one...

How would you describe the act of walking? Is it putting one foot in front of the other? Well, simply put, yes. Technically though, what your body has to do on autopilot would probably trip you up if you thought about it each time you had to take a step. It is, however, a form of motion -- usually forward motion.

The other day, I found myself coming to the "defense" of another person who happened to have a different condition than mine, but was exhibiting some of the same troubles I do when it comes to fine motor coordination. While pouring coffee some of it missed the mark-- ending up on the table and in the saucer.When I asked her if she cared for another saucer, she clearly stated that she would rather not have one. I smiled, waited a beat and took a sip of my own coffee before there was a rush to help her clean up and get her a saucer. I hastily repeated that she actually didn't want one. I realize now that my tone was less than calm, but I was sure at the time that they had heard her answer to me. I surprised myself.

What is the meaning of this slightly long-winded story? Walking could be a metaphor for learning. As you learn you move forward in life. As you move forward in life, you will hopefully ask more questions and, thereby, gain more knowledge. There is nothing wrong with asking a question, but the trick is to listen for the answer. When a good intentioned person doesn't listen to an answer given by me, I tend to acquiesce (especially if I don't know them well), and feel like I should have stood up for myself in the said situation.

So, I am here to tell anybody reading this who doesn't already know. A dis-ABILITY does not necessarily mean a lack of ability. It just means that we may do things a bit differently, and possibly slower. than the majority of the population. Go ahead and ask the question. We may need help. If you don't ask, you won't know. All I ask is that you listen to the answer given.